


Doing the Wacky

by faith_girl222 (faithgirl)



Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Genre: F/M, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2004-08-12
Updated: 2004-08-12
Packaged: 2018-04-05 08:25:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,844
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4172826
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/faithgirl/pseuds/faith_girl222
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Normalness and weirdness and doing the wacky. Just love on the Hellmouth.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Doing the Wacky

**Author's Note:**

> Set in early season two.
> 
> Beta by coppersinger.

China and silverware glittered as Buffy laid it out on the dinning room table, whistling softly to herself. Daylight glanced through the window and made her chest feel lighter, because so long as it was light she didn't have to worry about what lurked in the shadows. 

"Buffy," Joyce said, poking her head around the corner from the kitchen. Yummy homemade pizza smells drifted out from behind her. "Can you do me a favor and run upstairs and get me my watch?"

Buffy smiled back. Yay for normal boringness. Bless Giles and his prior engagement. "Sure."

"Thanks, honey."

Turning from the table she hurried upstairs, careful not to trip over her long skirt. As she swung round the corner into her mom's room, the phone rang. Snatching it up off the cradle, she plopped down onto the bed. "Hi."

"Hey. I'm not interrupting mother/daughter bonding time am I?" Willow asked, sounding worried.

"It's fine, Will, dinner's not even on the table yet."

Willow sighed in relief. "Good."

"I hear happy Willow voice. What happened? Is Xander there?"

"What? Maybe." Something crashed in the background. Willow's hand moved over the receiver. "Xander, stop that!"

Buffy giggled and wandered toward her mom's dressing table. Next to a lovely soft brush was the watch, and Buffy slipped it on. Then her eyes fell to the photo shoved into the frame. Hank and Joyce 16 years earlier, at the beach.

Buffy picked it up, smiling whimsically. She pressed the phone closer to her face and listened to Willow yammer about late night Indian TV and a Buggs Bunny revival going on. Xander laughed loudly in the background.

"Buffy!" Joyce was yelling from downstairs.

"I gotta go, Willow."

" 'kay. You doing any patrolling tonight?"

"None. Zilch. Staying in and watchin' movies and possibly eating ice cream. You have fun with Xander!"

Willow said goodbye and hung up, giggling at something Xander was doing. Buffy felt faintly jealous as she clicked the phone off and walked out of her mom's room, the photograph still in her hand.

* * *

In Buffy's dreams she's on a beach, Santa Monica or somewhere in L.A. And the sun is beating down, the water is super blue, with white frothy crests on the waves. She's on a towel, a big huge one with Wonder Woman printed on it. She's in the perfect bikini, pink with a sparkly and shimmery finish.

And in these dreams her parents are together, but they some how came to live in Sunnydale anyway. And this is vacation. And next to her is Angel, in a pair of swim trunks, not bursting into flames. Just laying there, chilling, wearing sunglasses. Sometimes he has book. Poetry or a classic novel. This one time he had a GQ. Usually he's talking to her, reciting poetry from memory, lips almost touching her cheek, breath puffing across her face. He smells like sunscreen and corn dogs and Dr. Pepper.

In the dreams, when Angel kisses her, the sky explodes with fireworks, like it's July 4th just for the two of them.

Often, more often these nights, they get ice cream and walk along the boardwalk and Willow & Xander are there, in a couple-y double-date-y capacity. And everything thing is nice. Xander and Angel don't bicker. They walk along and laugh and talk and it's like a scene from a movie.

But sometimes it's weird and Cordelia is there too. Usually when this happens Buffy points vaguely into the distance and yells "designer shoes" and Cordelia takes off after this imagined place.

Occasionally she and Angel will build sand castles and splash in the water or follow the edge of the beach, the water lapping at their feet.

In tonight's dream she and Angel are sitting on a dock, all wooden and splintery, but it's fine. Angel has swim trunks and a bright colored unbuttoned shirt on. He has an arm around her shoulders. He kisses her and there are those damn fireworks again. She kisses him back, and he leans her against the wooden planks that are all nailed together. He kisses her until she has to remind herself to breath. He smiles and his eyes glow, whether with love or lust Buffy can't tell.

His fingers slide over the straps of her perfect pink bikini, and fiddle with the clasp at the back. It comes away, and a shadow falls over them. Angel stares up like a 16-year-old caught in the path of the oncoming freight train of a furious parent.

Joyce stands over them. "Buffy, what are you doing?" she says.

* * *

"Buffy!" Joyce yelled louder. "Why aren't you up yet? You're going to be late! Buffy!"

Buffy jerked awake in bed. "What? We weren't doing anything," she mumbled. "I'm up mom!"

Buffy pulled herself from the entangling bed sheets and stumbled toward her dresser. Five minutes later she had on a tight mauve top that sat perfectly around her shoulders, paired with a beige skirt that came part way down her thighs. Buffy snatched up her purse and bag and dashed out the door and downstairs.

* * *

Xander and Willow were sitting in the lounge sharing a Coke when Buffy got there. Clearly "you're going to be late" is a parents' reason for everything and her mom hadn't had any idea what she was talking about. There was lots of time to hang with her buds before Home Room.

"Hi!" Buffy said brightly.

"Hola," Xander said, and offered the half drunk can of Coke to her.

Buffy tried not to giggle. Too much. "I can go over there and buy my own, Xand. In fact, I think I will do just that."

Xander shrugged as she clattered back down to the vending machines in her ridiculously high shoes.

"So, do think Giles will say something about the shoes?" Willow took the Coke back from him.

"Maybe. Probably not. He'll think something though, and we will be left bereft of Giles-provided entertainment. Stupid Britishness keeps him from saying things I bet would be comedy gold! Think, we could like pitch a show where it's this British guy saying all the awful things most of them think but won't say because of their inherent Britishness!"

"Xander, you scare me sometimes," Buffy said, sitting down across from them.

"See! Scaring you is entertainment. I put in my entertainment requirement."

Willow patted him arm. "Of course you do."

* * *

In English Ms. Murray talked about Shakespeare. Romeo & Juliet and the unending literary insistence of putting two pretty, young people in a situation that really blows. While she lectured about iambic pentameter and Shakespeare's word usage and the various modern things Romeo & Juliet had inspired, Buffy began playing out the story in her head, with her cast as Juliet and Angel as Romeo.

She doodled vaguely in the margins of her barely-there notes. Buffy scribbled B&A and B+A and Buffy & Angel in fancy scrawl which was a poor imitation of Giles' lovely handwriting. And then, when she found Ms. Murray glancing in her direction, she began writing R&J, and writing down the interesting words Shakespeare used that Ms. Murray wouldn't shut up about.

Then Buffy's mind wandered to Angel and words. And she wondered what he would sound like saying "banana". Or if she would ever know him well enough to even think of asking him to say it for her. As Ms. Murray recapped the lesson Buffy thought about rambling about bananas and monkeys the next time she saw Angel. Then he might say banana as part of "why the hell are you talking about bananas, Buffy?"

Willow kicked her under the desk. Buffy stared forward at the board. It was covered in writing. Buffy turned back to her paper and hurriedly copied it all down.

The bell rang. Crazy Fantasy Land was over.

* * *

Giles stared at her over the long wicked looking sword. Buffy couldn't help but notice how shiny it was. "Right. This is a special sword," Giles was saying, and Buffy listened intently. Cause it was a damn cool sword.

"Not magical, so much as built to be used a certain way. No random brandishing, or, or vague swings and parries. If you want to use this sword, you'll need to pay close attention."

Giles did some intricate footwork Buffy couldn't really follow, and continued on in this manner for a while, eventually he handed it off to her. She took to it like a duck to water, if that duck had been attached to a canon ball. 

After she'd nearly sliced Giles into several pieces more than once, he took the sword from her.

"Well, that's, that's all for tonight. Run along home, or, or, go to the Bronze."

"Right. And whatever will you do with yourself?"

"I, I'll have you know I have some rather pressing plans with a book."

* * *

The Bronze was happening and Giles was climbing toward sainthood in Buffy's head as she moved from the doors toward her friends. Willow and Xander were sitting at a table tucked under the staircase. Willow twitched and nearly knocked her stool over when Buffy showed up.

"Hi!" Willow glanced nervously toward Xander.

Buffy's gaze moved back and forth between them. "What's going on?"

"Nothing!" Xander yelped.

"You two are acting majorly weird. Hyper much?"

"Coffee!" Willow yelled then slapped her hands over her mouth when people turned to look.

"Yes!"

Buffy blinked. "Wow, I suddenly feel very sane."

"Dance!" Xander said and ran off onto the floor, getting ready to permanently scar everyone with his "dancing". Buffy plopped down next top Willow, whose eyes were riveted on the gyrating Xander.

"Wow. He really needs some lessons, or maybe a sense of rhythm."

"Yeah. . ." Willow blinked, her thoughts fogging. " He should really stick to the Snoopy Dance. But he looks so cute!"

Buffy smiled at her, and tried hard to keep her eyes from rolling. Thinking of Angel kept them still. "Willow, Willow. We've talked about this. Xander is a guy, and therefore will spend the rest of his life oblivious to the obvious."

"Sometimes I wonder. He's been different since – "

"Oh my god!" Xander exclaimed, spinning toward them. Buffy blinked again. Turned herself around.

Jenny was dragging Giles through the din toward the coffee bar. Buffy uttered her own "oh my god".

They spluttered.

"He had plans! With a book! Since when is a date a book?"

"Since Giles learned to lie! To us!" Xander's mouth was hanging open, making Buffy feel thoroughly unshocked in comparison.

"But they're so cute!" Buffy and Xander turned on Willow. She quickly hid behind her huge coffee mug. "In a creepy way."

Xander snorted, and broke eye contact with Buffy.

"No more creepy than Mr. 200-Year-Old Dead Guy macking on Buffy. How's that going by the way?"

Buffy glared at him. "I don't know, at least he isn't a giant praying mantis bent on stealing my virginity and then eating me."

"You don't know that!"

Now she couldn't keep her eyes from rolling, hugely.

"So, uh." Willow cast around for a new topic. "You said something about a barbeque on Friday?"

* * *

Giles stood poised by the coffee machine. The Staff Room was empty. Most teachers left campus or hid in their offices for lunch. But Giles knew Jenny would be along shortly for her afternoon caffeine fix. He knew this because he'd carefully observed it for a week from behind a Los Angeles Times, so she wouldn't know it was him. Although he feared the tweed had perhaps given him away.

The doorknob jiggled. Giles' hand twitched. The other shot out and caught the box of sugar it had bumped into, before it could slide off the counter. The door swung open as Giles hid the Sweet 'n Low behind his back. In stepped Jenny.

A pen was stuck behind her ear and she had several textbooks and a thick stack of printouts resting against her hip.

Giles rushed across the room to help. Before he knew it, he'd fumbled the enormous pile. Amid a chorus of sorrys and it's okays, the books flumped ungraciously to the floor. They both quickly bent down, nearly knocking heads. Giles began stammering.

"Rupert." Jenny smiled at him and he swore his brain fell out the back of his head. "It's okay, really. See, they didn't even scatter."

"Coffee!"

"What?"

"I made sure there was some for you. I know you always get some at lunch." His voice seemed unusually loud to his ears. Giles wondered faintly if his nerves were causing him to shout.

But Jenny just smiled. He figured if she was smiling he couldn't be doing anything too objectionable. 

* * *

The Vid Shack buzzed with Friday afternoon patrons. Xander shuffled between two halves of an arguing couple. Willow took in the new releases section behind him.

"We could rent 'Space Jam'. Wean you off that Buggs Bunny marathon. Plus, Michael Jordan. You ever notice how there are so many famous Michael Js? Michael Jordan, Michael Jackson . . ."

"That's only two, Will."

"But still, weird, huh?"

Buffy fought her way through the crowd as Xander did he his vague "I think you're crazy" nod.

"Well, we could get 'Empire Records', except they're fresh out."

"Come on," Xander said. "We're resourceful. We can find something. There are shelves and shelves."

Willow had eager face. "I suggested 'Space Jam'!"

"Just so it's known, we are not renting 'Junior'. It was the most frightening film I've ever seen. And I saw 'Psycho' when I was three!"

Buffy nodded smartly. "Noted."

"There's always Molly Ringwald."

"I'm good for 'Sixteen Candles'. I feel very up for swearing and nudity."

Buffy peered about. "They have 'Mallrats' too, which has plenty of both. We might want something we can watch in front of my mom though."

Xander frowned. "Why in front of your mom? Did she take away your TV? Why doesn’t' anyone tell me anything?"

"I just mean she might be a little less on our backs if, say, we were watching something tame in the living room while she attempts to use the barbeque."

"Attempt?" Willow gulped.

"It'll be fine. 'sides, I have the phone and take out menus ready in case of the worst."

"Soo . . ."

"I'll get the Ringwald." Willow wondered off.

"'Clerks' too?" Buffy nodded, and Xander strode past her.

"Now for some Cusack with a side of 'Heathers'."

* * *

Buffy pushed her hands further into the pocket on her pullover. A breeze scattered leaves around her feet. She kicked at them as she walked past a pyramid mausoleum. Buffy'd always figured some Egyptian guy had come to Sunnydale, kicked the bucket or been killed or something, and had a very demanding will . . .

"Actually his wife requested it."

Buffy spun around, slamming her shoulder into Angel.

"What?"

"You were talking out loud. The pyramid. It was asked for by the guy's wife. So they could be buried together, later."

"Oh." Buffy fiddled with her stake. "That's kinda creepy. And strangely romantic."

Angel looked at his feet, then the sky. He opened his mouth to say something – 

"Banana!"

"What? Buffy, did you just shout banana?"

"Uh-huh."

"Are you okay? Is something wrong? It's really early to be patrolling."

Her eyes felt very wide. Her banana plot had worked. Hurrah! "I need to make a quick sweep. My mom is having this barbeque thing."

"Neat." Angel looked, disturbed? Maybe nonplussed . . . 

"I'd ask you to come, but mom would flip out. And, it's sorta meant to be quality Scooby time."

"That's nice. Is Giles going to be there?"

Buffy frowned, then shrugged it off. "No, actually he has a date tonight."

"Giles?"

"Yep. Third this week. Kinda scary when your middle-aged Watcher has more of a life than you do."

"I can't imagine you not having a life. They boys must be," he shuddered, "all over you."

"Even if they were – which for the record they aren't – it wouldn't really matter."

Their eyes met. The air seemed to disappear. Buffy would have gulped for air, if she could've made herself move. The space between them dwindled until their lips were nearly touching. Buffy tilted her head back and – 

\- was kissing thin air.

Angel had run off silently like, well, a really silent thing,

* * *

Buffy tossed her unneeded keys on the foyer table.

"Hi hon."

She hid the stake behind her back, a huge grin blooming on her face.

"Mom! Hi! How's the barbeque?"

"It's going really well. Willow and Xander are upstairs. Something about movies – "

"Thanks!" Buffy pecked Joyce on the cheek and scurried upstairs, careful all the while to conceal the stake.

As she rounded the corner of the hall, strange noises were coming from her bedroom. Buffy cautiously pushed the door open. Inside, on her bed, were Willow and Xander, participating in heavy making out.

A little scream of surprise escaped her and she slammed the door shut.

"Oh, god, everyone is getting some but me." Buffy thudded her head against the door. Thoughts of Angel in the cemetery stuck out. "Stupid chicken non-boyfriend. I can still hear you in there you know!"


End file.
